Posts Tagged ‘Travel’

59754_10151504011770590_1858561379_n

I snapped.
Today came too quickly.The monotony hit me like a brick wall suddenly jutting up around a bend in the road and travel was the only way to dissolve it. 
My only and last chance to breath was to break free.
It was obvious in that moment that these walls were all wrong.
Erected to lull into a confinement of safety and borders
If you were walking slow you might have missed the energy
The adamantine force that hits you saying “This is so wrong! It does NOT belong.”
How can limiting yourself possibly be right?
Life is a road and a journey 
No man can make a wall and label it a home
No one would believe such a lie if they were on the move
They would run full force into an obstruction
The soul would scream out ‘why?!’
 This didn’t help me on my journey, it is telling me to stop
Get comfy
Rest
It won’t allow me to pass after I settle here
It will surely say “no!”
Safety beyond those walls is not possible it will then say.
One cannot erect a wall and expect it to not desire to stay.
Everything demands a purpose and will fight to prove their way.
So why would making a solid wall in the middle of the road prove wise?

I broke down that wall
I felt the decay
I had to regenerate all my heart walls that day
I paid attention to where the roots grew
I saw what I was made of and what simply would not do.
To my great surprise my home had no walls
Not for shelter
Not within my country
Not within my planet
Not within this solar system
I had no walls
I didn’t need them it turns out
My soul is endless and I do not fear flying deep within the stars
to discover and follow the solar winds of my world 

You can be 100% real and complete without covering up or repressing. I own my sadness & heartaches but do not broadcast them because I am ok with letting them not be the most important part in my life. If there is even 1% happiness, .02% Joy I choose to spend my time on that part because that is what is most important to my soul. Dark can only be part of the picture if there is a focus on the light ♥ Be yourself and love all about yourself but choose to find and move into your light. that is the most real and powerful move that can be made =) Smile. Do no harm to others. Let them learn from your travels and your hardships but do not throw the darkness around to suffocate others by feeling it, or to get sympathy. Live 100% up to your own standards and share what you learn and feel. 

The land of cactus’s. Spreading out as far as the eye can see…a terrain of ‘don’t mess with me’ I will survive rain and cold and hurt you if you touch me. Small Cacti, Large Cacti…a wilderness of them staring back at you as you drive. “A human being is a part of the whole called by us universe, a part limited in time and space. He experiences himself, his thoughts and feeling as something separated from the rest, a kind of optical delusion of his consciousness. This delusion is a kind of prison for us, restricting us to our personal desires and to affection for a few persons nearest to us. Our task must be to free ourselves from this prison by widening our circle of compassion to embrace all living creatures and the whole of nature in its beauty” Image

ImageThe Earth has music for those who listen. Image

One minute, just like life, you are driving along in the heat, getting used to cactus land and the next you find snow covered hills, getting colder and colder by the mile…wondering why it is always necessary to be in places you don’t want to be…Image

“You do not have to be good.
You do not have to walk on your knees
for a hundred miles through the desert, repenting.
You only have to let the soft animal of your body 
love what it loves.
Tell me about despair, yours, and I will tell you mine.
Meanwhile the world goes on.
Meanwhile the sun and the clear pebbles of the rain
are moving across the landscapes,
over the prairies and the deep trees,
the mountains and the rivers.
Meanwhile the wild geese, high in the clean blue air,
are heading home again.
Whoever you are, no matter how lonely,
the world offers itself to your imagination,
call to you like the wild geese, harsh and exciting –
over and over announcing your place
in the family of things” You simply belong no matter where you are. Image

You are free to be silly. The world expects you to be the one and only ‘you’. The best remedy for those who are afraid, lonely or unhappy is to go outside, somewhere where they can be quite alone with the heavens, nature and God. Because only then does one feel that all is as it should be and that God wishes to see people happy, amidst the simple beauty of nature. As longs as this exists, and it certainly always will, I know that then there will always be comfort for every sorrow, whatever the circumstances may be. And I firmly believe that nature brings solace in all troublesImage

Those who contemplate the beauty of the earth find reserves of strength that will endure as long as life lasts. There is something infinitely healing in the repeated refrains of nature — the assurance that dawn comes after night, and spring after winterImage

 

Image

 

Image

I like this place and think I could waste my time here. A quiet secluded life in the country, with the possibility of being useful to people to whom it is easy to do good, and who are not accustomed to have it done to them; then work which one hopes may be of some use; then rest, nature, books, music, love for one’s neighbor — such is my idea of happiness…Leo Tolstoy  Image

Image

Image

Image

This life is yours. Take the power to choose what you want to do and do it well. Take the power to love what you want in life and love it honestly. Take the power to walk in the forest and be a part of nature. Take the power to control your own life. No one else can do it for you. Take the power to make your life happyImage

Image

Image

 

Image

 

Image

Image

 

Image

 

Image

Image

Image

 

 

arizona 162_edited

arizona 164_edited

arizona 165_edited

arizona 170_edited

arizona 170_edited

arizona 172_edited

arizona 173_edited

arizona 174_edited

arizona 175_edited

arizona 178_edited

arizona 179_edited

arizona 181_edited

arizona 182_edited

arizona 186_edited

arizona 197

Image

 

“Mom are we going to Texas? Where the deep blue sea is?” Ethan asked.
“Nope we are going to Arizona”
“Whats Arizona?”
“A place with palm trees, some good hikes, and new adventures…not quite far enough for the deep blue sea”
“Oh”     PAUSE….. “I want to go back home then”

10 hour trip up to Montana for 3 days. Car troubles. Montana trip extended to 10 days. Returning to Utah we only had 3 days before taking off on this trip to Arizona. We fit lots of good times in while in utah and then packed up again. Ethan had helped pack up his cars and was the first to wake up. He ran over to his stuffed animal Raja, picked him up with his backpack loaded heavy with cars and superheros and whispered (his attempt at being good while his sister was still asleep) “Lets go mom”. 
We hit Page, Arizona and decided we had to pull over. The trip was pretty long to head another 10 hours the other direction and the kids were done early this time. We stopped for food and headed on our way when the car started to make shaking and banging sounds. We had blown a tire. I didn’t think we had air in the spare tire. Soon we discovered it wasn’t a tire problem at all but a brake problem. A simple Crescent Wrench would do the trick but no one would pull over. The few who did didn’t have any tools. Then it was pitch black. 911 informed me that we could call a towing service but the shop told me they wouldn’t bring  a wrench; we would have to pay the full towing price back to page. Then a highway patroleman went and found a wrench and came to our aide. He arrived an hour and a half past Aurianne sobbing her eyes out and being rebundled into her carseat to stay out of the cold (She had some sort of cold or ear infection-either way a miserable almost 1 year old). He arrived after Ethan lost his 4 year old reserves and started jumping around like a monkey on crack, calling names, banging his knee on everything in site, until he finally crashed like he was on ambien on a very worn out, frazzled mother. He came in a bomb squad blue hoodie and jeans, handlebar mustach and wife/date in the off-duty car. He was the greatest helper in the world and after being stuck on the side of the road for 3+ hours we were on our way again. 
We all were running on little sleep, half of us sick, overly tired from travel and we had to make one more stop in the dark. It was a nervous stop in the middle of nowhere while things were fixed and rearranged. A car stopped behind us by about 20 feet. odd. There wasn’t a house within miles and miles. We hopped back in the car and took off without incident and arrived in Phoenix at 2am. 
Little tiny one bedroom. Auirannes foldout bed barely fitting *by ingenious means* within the bathroom, Ethan on a foldout couch. But warm. A fridge. And Palm Trees. With another hour or two of coaxing all kids were sound asleep and I crashed into bed. I saw plenty of mental mud on this trip. I doubt I can say more than one thing went the way I was planning. still might not go to plan the rest of the week. Dirty. Messy. Miserable. But worth it! Planted seeds in the watery, earthen mess and turned some light on it. We can make it through anything. I have a few bruises. I pulled my neck somehow. I mentally wanted to escape into dreamland inside silken sheets on top a soft mattress. But we made it. Things are going in the right direction. Out of the chaos I shot forward with some great ideas for growth and light. Two days after we broke down outside of Page this happened….

Image

 

Right about where we broke down is now shattered and broken but we are whole. Paths require mud. They require pain. The roads to miraculous places aren’t usually paved nor easy. So, when mud comes along and makes your day murky…remember, plant something good, work through it, let it rain, and shine some light on it! 

Image

 

Image

Image

Image